Interesting Hostess Gift Ideas

One of my passions is looking for fabulous embroidered linen pieces, whether they are napkins, tablecloths, handkerchiefs or other pieces.

Most often it is the skill of the embroiderer that draws me to a particular piece. You can tell when items are hand worked and often you can tell the age of the person based on the skill of the embroidery.

Probably one of the more reasonable ways to start collecting is to seek out handkerchiefs. Thousands were made- many as wedding handkerchiefs- and then put away because they were “too good to use” everyday.

A new project I’ve been having great fun with is looking for specific initials for each hostess that is involved in a shower for a bridal client of ours from www.StylinBride.com

She found our website and saw some of the vintage pieces we show as ideas for gifts. And asked us to look for specific ones, with the kind of embroidery I love.

That’s like letting loose a kid in a candy store!

Worse for me, because I often have the habit of “buy one buy two” as one is invariably for my collection. (I collect all initials-which is ridiculous in a way- but I just love it anyway).

Don’t limit yourself to buying for just a wedding. I love to send “hankies” as my Grandma called them to friends and family for birthdays, St. Valentine’s Day or for just a “thinking of you” gift.

And if you have any children (grand, friend’s or otherwise), they can always use a hankie.

Check out my Flickr account for a limited number of photos I have under antique linen. It’s only limited by the fact that I haven’t had time to photograph every piece of my collection.

I have better things to do -like shop!

How to merge YOUR ideas with your Mother’s on YOUR wedding day

This is a tough thing to do, even when you both are on the same page.

When I got married (prehistoric times) there were two choices in invitations- white or ivory. Black ink. Very formal wording for the invitation, straight out of Emily Post. And computers weren’t handy so you handwrote all of your invitations- or hoped your Mother’s handwriting, sister’s or friend’s might save the day.

Just to go on record- my invitations were a beautiful shade of moss; with a contemporary, block style of type. They didn’t match anything else in my color scheme. That’s OK. I can say that my future in-laws weren’t thrilled with this unconventional choice. But it was small potatoes compared to what else was coming around the bend.

There are so many choices it can make your head spin. And even once you have decided on something, you might see something else that you like better.

So here’s some advice-

Take time- but not forever. When you see it, trust your decision and don’t look back. Move forward and stay the course, because you have so many more decisions to make before you walk down the aisle.

Do not forget along the way to keep your sense of humor, act graciously and thank any and all who offer advice. (As Miss Manners would say acknowledgement is not a commitment- it just means you have heard them and thanked them for their kind expressions of information).

So in dealing with your Mother, his Mother and everyone else, it’s a fine line between pushing and pulling. Compromise isn’t easy- so pick the items you’re pretty set on and also make a list of items where you could encourage (or accept) input and help in the final decision.

Give and Take. Push and Pull. Because in the end, that is what marriage and work and friendship is all about.

Hot Jewels to Wear this Wedding Season

One of my guilty pleasures is to check out all the Red Carpet events- to see the dresses, hair styles and definitely the jewelry.

One can dream about the pieces from the jewelers to the stars- of course Tiffany, Cartier, Harry Winston, Fred Leighton and the ever present Neil Lane. (I had a chance to go into a Neil Lane store in Los Vegas several years ago- that’s a whole other story. But it was certainly a swoon just looking at the stuff in the cases and the casual price comments by the staff. I guess when you touch and talk about these beautiful pieces prices become less important than the piece itself).

So, I really go for vintage costume jewelry. It certainly has many great designers- Weiss, Miriam Haskell to name two of my favorites- and often you can get a similar look for a very reasonable price. Notice I did not say cheap- Good costume jewelry uses good materials to start.

Thank about what you would want to copy on the Red Carpet so far this year. Was it a great looking brooch or jeweled belt at the waistline- or a vintage inspired dress clip or brooch in the hair?

One of my favorite places to look is www.rubylane.com and my favorite store is A Twinkle In Time.  You can find some great looks- my weakness is clear crystals or brooches that are in the shape of a bow- and they are fun and easy to wear on a jacket or a coat lapel. My staff even finds great garage sale pins that I wear on my work apron.

Of course, the rule of “Diamonds are a girl’s best friend” applies if that handsome groom thinks about some bling for your ears, wrist or neckline of your wedding dress. Take advantage of that thought!

Ready, Set, Wed!

January came out of nowhere and we were in the throes of planning and executing our annual Bridal Showcase.

It is quite a change from our Holiday wrapping season- we have to switch gears and look at the upcoming trends, colors and all the details that surround weddings. So it’s more a thinking process in the beginning that flows into a doing process.

The new forecasted hot color is turquoise. (Funny, it’s been one of my favorites since 2002. I had my logos redesigned and then started planning my escape from housing the business in my basement).

Back to 2010 January and preparing for Bridal Showcase. It was tough sledding finding turquoise in magazines. For us, we just don’t look at wedding related publications, but we comb catalogs and retail stores that carry home furnishings, like pillows and rugs or women’s accessories, like purses, shoes, scarves and other fashion items.

We are actually seeing a little more turquoise showing up in the “shoulder” season- the waiting time between Winter and when Spring will arrive. (This is really more chance than science in our Northern location- because it often snows on Easter!).

This same thing happened to last year’s color purple. It took until about early summer before the color became prominent and then continued right through November. And of course, at all the Hollywood events, like Golden Globes 2010, every shade of purple could be spotted in many of the dresses worn on the Red Carpet.

So if turquoise is the color for you, you’ll start seeing more and more of this color as spring items start to appear.

And if it is not- Black and White with an accent color, Brown and Champagne and Hot Pink and Bright Orange are still going strong. Visit our web site at www.StylinBride.com.

HIS and HERS Wedding Showers – are you kidding?

I had one of these. It actually was a lot of fun looking back.

It does require enthusiasm on the part of the groom. Big time.

So, here’s how it can work. Register for things your groom would like to have. Power Tools. Trash cans. Leaf blowers. Gas Grills.

Or think smaller. Steak thermometers. Carving knife set. Beer glasses.

You know, Guy Stuff.

Because if your future husband was anything like mine, he dragged his feet around the Department Store while I enthused “Isn’t this wonderful, honey?” to which I got a nod, a grunt or a groan.

Sometimes sheets got him carried away with romantic thoughts. But really, he probably wished to be sitting and having a beer while I did the whole thing.

It’s a woman DNA thing to enjoy the whole wedding registry thing.

So back to the HIS/HERS shower. Definitely no party games. Make the menu fun (not girlie shower food) and think about an evening date. Give time to admire his stuff and be enthusiastic about his stuff.

And then give him time-off for good behavior.

Party games at Bridal Showers…are they revelant?

I shudder at the thought of party games at bridal showers.

Call me a party-pooper or a bucket of cold water.

I really hate them. (OK- I’m sure I’m going to get hooted on for this). I just think they are a dumb cover for not having to be a good guest and introduce yourself to other people at the shower and carry on a real conversation.

So let me interject a thought or two here about games.

Have them if you will- but just update them. Ideas that were titillating in the 1950’s are corny unless the theme of the shower is “Leave It to Beaver”/ June Cleaver with twin sets and aprons, cute hankies and pearls.  If you want the “kitschy” era to be the theme of the shower then really play it out.  This may require some research (or you can call an “oldie” like me) – but you can pull off something like this with the right ideas and the right information.

Don’t play games but entertain your guests. Like have a tea party and hire a tea expert to explain why tea parties were held, how tea should be prepared, what food was eaten or other pieces of information, all in a lovely, quaint setting. Many local hotels offer this kind of experience at a reasonable price- or check for a local tea shop, maybe even a Bed and Breakfast for a smaller venue.

Other ideas- bring in an etiquette expert, handwriting analysis expert, or local historian- something that is a form of entertainment but can also give your guests information that is fun and interesting.

I feel strongly that brides of today don’t wish to re-visit how their mothers were feted way back when.  Done well and cleverly, a wedding shower can be a wonderful to celebrate the path to your wedding day.

Wedding Consultant – Once More

OK- I just blogged about getting a wedding consultant, planner or coordinator. All these titles are the equal. But not all these people who use these titles are the same.

Who is an “expert”?
Your best friend got married a year ago. Ding-ding-ding- Oh, so not a wedding expert. She did a lot of research but has one wedding under her belt.

Next one to get heaved off your list- a family member. Now I know that some families get along really well. Truly.

But emotions get in the way of things and even with clearly defined boundaries, someone has to be the “fall guy” when something goes wrong. And trust me, things do go wrong. I just wouldn’t want to have to carry that to my death- and you know every holiday get together will provide more opportunity to “re-visit” that memorable mistake.

So a real wedding expert- by whatever name they go by- is truly the third party or neutral party in any and every situation. They can be your go-to person when something is bugging you or you don’t feel you are being heard. They can handle any touchy situation- like a difference of opinion between your Mother and your future Mother-in-law- say about seating at the reception. They can work with all the specialty vendors- and be your conscience when it comes to sticking to your budget or knowing where to spend a little extra and where to cut a little back.

Yes, they do cost. Put it in your budget under Peace of Mind.

What’s the difference anyway?

Sure you can save a few bucks by organizing your own wedding. And I am here to tell you that there’s nothing wrong with that.

But let me pose a question to you….how are you going to tell the music to play and start the wedding procession down the aisle when you are the last one in the line to walk down?

This is just one of the thousands of details that every bride faces as she plans the storybook wedding that she has dreamt of all her life.

However, things can and will go wrong. You must have a Plan A, Plan B and maybe C, D, E, and so on.

A seasoned professional knows a lot. They know what can and will go wrong. They have the knowledge and experience and they have a list of things that even you, a well organized, focused individual, has not thought of. I am not saying that you can’t develop that knowledge and skill- but this is your first time and it’s your big day.

So let me add a few more items to consider.

What if you have planned an outdoors ceremony and the walk to the beautiful path with strewn rose petals “accidentally” gets wet when the automatic sprinklers go off one hour before your guests arrive?

How about the harpist playing behind where your guests are seated and none of your guests has any idea that the ceremony has started?

Do you let your guests wander in and pick a seat or would you prefer the more traditional bride’s family on the left and the groom’s family on the right?

Or my personal favorite- it’s a unique blended religious ceremony where two families of different faiths join to witness your marriage.

And no one has any information- any booklet, pamphlet or simple sheet of paper- on how the wedding will proceed, what they are supposed to do or say and the “officiant” is not giving any verbal clues (hello, how about saying “please rise”????)?

This is not the time to go it alone.  You see a Doctor when you are sick, you call your insurance person when you are in a car accident, and you call your Mother or Father when you need their perfect advice…so why not have a wedding consultant work out all the details for your perfect wedding.

Wedding consultants come in all sizes, ethnicity, religious affiliation and price ranges.  You would be surprised at the heavy lifting they can do on your behalf. They truly have seen it all and done it all.

And, best of all, they can do it for you.

The Art of Monogramming – from linens to stationery

Another one of my passions is the art of monogramming. It is a very old art or form of identifying who you are.

 

Hot wax and seals were one way to identify that this was an authentic document- because not everyone could read and write. The signet ring has the same history, where the stamp in ink or wax signified authenticity. Go back to ancient China and see the “chop” was the method of showing your name in the Chinese alphabet, and was attached as artist signatures as well as official government designations.

 

As young women got their bridal trousseau together, like blankets, sheets, pillowcases and other bridal items, they often would monogram these items. If they weren’t engaged, they would put a simple, single letter on their linen, or leave it blank until their engagement, and then go back and embroider their new initials.

 

Remember when Lane Furniture was pushing their HOPE chests, as a place you could start to accumulate these items? (My sisters and I would always joke about “HOPE-less” chests- but that’s a long story.) That idea came from old European traditions of storing these items until you were married.

 

The traditional monogram of three letters would have the first letter be the bride’s first name, the last letter is her maiden name and the largest, and center initial letter would be her new married last name.

 

Currently, the “newest” way to look at monograms give brides and grooms many ways to show off their personalities and combining names.

 

The latest trends are the bride’s first name spelled out or just the initial in the first place, then the groom’s first initial or spelled first name in the third place and the center would be the last name initial. 

 

Brides and their Grooms are also having custom, personalized monograms designed to use every where- from place cards or cake toppers, to wedding invitations or aisle runners. Done right, they can be the personalized and unique expression for your wedding.

 

And sometimes, you may get lucky as I did once, and find vintage linen that had all of my initials exactly right. No choice but to buy that item- I mean what were the chances that I would find this again?

 

Where to find that artist that can create your monogram? Look for calligraphers in your area or graphic designers to design one that is perfect for you. We have a designer on staff and a calligrapher we love to recommend.

Vintage linens – bring out the best to create the memories

When I was in High School, I was fortunate enough to have a very interesting job as a crafts interpreter at the Ford Museum/ Greenfield Village in Dearborn, MI.

 

I wasn’t sure that I would get this job, but I knew how to weave and I thought that this would give me a step towards becoming an interpreter. Plus, my family and I had vacationed at Williamsburg, another historic museum where the crafts of early colonial times were actively practiced, and I fell in love with being able to demonstrate my skills.

 

So I went to Greenfield Village every day, wearing a “period appropriate” costume and explained how weaving was done and demonstrated natural dyeing and spinning wool.

I also got to learn about silk manufacturing here in the Untied States and demonstrating how silkworm cocoons were boiled and then unraveled and twisted into silk. (On a hot day, that was not the favorite work assignment since you were in this little, tiny cottage, with an open boiling pot of water. Think dripping sweat).

 

That’s where my love of “old” started- and I have in my collection of things two antique spinning wheels, a Cranbrook loom that weaves 60″ wide, lots of yarn, an antique coverlet, a beautiful quilt made by my great-great-grandmother, and a host of all other kinds of things.

 

Which brings me to my vintage collection of linens. I love the craftsmanship of these artisans who worked patiently and diligently to bring the most exquisite embroidery, drawn work, monogramming, tatting, crocheting, lace making and other needle arts to us.

 

I have been lucky enough to inherit some beautiful pieces from my grandmother as well as buy from knowledgeable experts pieces that work with my everyday, formal and Christmas china sets. (Well, at least I have held that collection opportunity in check).

 

So I am passionate about collecting and passing forward these pieces of what might have been considered ordinary “art” to today’s brides.

 

Why? Because you will not see this level of expert needlework ever again.  Nor the quality of materials. Or the individual effort in making something beautiful by hand.

 

What you will get is machine made, quantity oriented, polyester, non- wrinkle fabric that has been embroidered by a machine with a design that will be copied endlessly.

 

And guess what? The price for this “new” one will be the same or more than buying a pristine, vintage piece. Funny…

 

So, savor the pieces that have been handed down from generation to generation. USE them- they won’t break. Wash them carefully and if you don’t know how to do that, contact me. I would be happy to help you care for this treasured object.

 

And best of all, create memories with this special formal tablecloth, or hankie at your wedding or funky 50’s shabby chic kitchen tablecloth you use to celebrate birthdays, anniversaries, you got an “A” on your test and any other ways to corral your family together.

 

Because stories aren’t always in the photographs- they are in the moments you spend together.